Me too!
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
