playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
