i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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