she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize