look no pants
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You have to summon your inner elephant
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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