walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
