Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
