May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
