Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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