8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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