Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
