just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize