she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
