You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
