So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
my poor anus
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
