Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
you will always have a special place in my vag
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
