Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
