Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
