road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
