yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize