it hurts more in the daytime
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
