But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Life is so much better after having sex.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
