actually, I'm a sock model
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
