Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
