yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
