We should be called the Road Head Warriors
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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