I wish i was in the wii world.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
