How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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