Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
