garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
