Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Church boner. Awkwardddd
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
