I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
