Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
