Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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