When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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