I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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