i just had sex bonerless
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
