Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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