atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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