I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
BRING THE BAGELS
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
