Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
