Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
