is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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