The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
