Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Randomize
