This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
