Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
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