If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize