Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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