she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize