when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
as a side note pls kill me
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
