9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
